Our Story

I am going to take a friend's challenge to write about how Jeff and I met. This is a confusing story, but really soap opera-like. It would be much better if Days of Our Lives told the story, but all you have is me, so bear with me! Also, this is really long and probably too detailed, but I wanted to remember all of it for me because I haven't written it down yet. Here goes!

It all begins before Jeff and I even met at my Freshman year of college here at BYU. I had some girlfriends that I hung out with. One was named Crystal and another Maria. I also had a boyfriend that I hung out with quite a bit. We were as serious as you can be before a guy's mission and planned on getting married when he got back from his mission. His name was Joseph. During that year, I was Relief Society President in my ward and so met quite a bit with the bishop. During one random meeting, the bishop gave me a blessing as I was struggling to balance school, friends, and my calling. In the blessing he said that I haven't yet met the person I was going to marry. I freaked out! I was in love with this kid and was very very upset. I didn't tell Joseph for awhile, but then finally told him right before we split the end of our Freshman year and he went on his mission. He was as distraught as I was and we just interpreted it to mean that it could be he isn't the man I am going to marry...YET. :) But I later asked the bishop about it and he said although he couldn't remember giving me the blessing, he felt to tell me that I had interpreted it correctly...whatever that means! Anyway, Joseph went on his mission and I continued going to school, faithfully writing him every week and not dating pretty much anyone for about 23 months into his 24 month mission.

Joseph was scheduled to be home July 2nd. A couple months prior to that, I was visiting my uncle and aunt in St. George, Utah. I was pretty sick physically at that point in my life and asked my uncle for a blessing. In in he said I would be healed and more importantly, he said that my eternal companion was within arms reach and Heavenly Father had prepared and chosen someone for me to marry. Of course at the time, I thought it was Joseph because he was coming home in a couple months.

Meanwhile, this whole time, my friend Maria from Freshman year and I were meeting for lunch every week and hanging out. I would always ask how Crystal (my other friend from Freshman year and roommate of Maria at the time) and her boyfriend (Jeff-my husband) were doing. She would tell me that they just needed to break up, that Crystal was a mess and they fought all the time. About the end of April, they did break up and Maria and I moved in with each other for Spring term. So then Crystal's ex-boyfriend and all his roommates would come over to our apartment Spring term to watch cable TV (ESPN).

When I met Jeff, he had just broken up with Crystal, who was my friend, I only had two months before Joseph got home, I was still smitten by the memory of Joseph, and I assumed I had already been told in a blessing that I was going to marry Joseph.

Back to Jeff: I was not interested in Jeff at all when I first met him. My guess is this is because he and his roommates were all really cute and I never thought I would have a chance with any of them and cute boys are always stuck up and think they are too good for you, plus Joseph got home really soon.

One day he asked me to hang out and go to the mall with him, then get something to eat. He said he had a couple shirts he wanted to buy and wanted a girl's professional opinion, so I went and we had fun. Then we went to Cafe Rio to eat and shared a burrito. It was yummy and I was confused...I was starting to look forward to him coming over to hang out with my roommates and me. He would even skip out on watching ESPN with his roommates at my apartment to play Phase 10 with me or help me cook in the kitchen. And I found Jeff coming over more and more and more. In fact, he did not play those dating games at all. When he was not at work, he was at my house. If he got off at 11:30 p.m., I could count on him being there at 11:35 p.m. One time I was so confused because I realized I was starting to have feelings for him that I turned off all the lights and pretended I was not home so he wouldn't come over after work one night. I needed time to think. I could tell he was home because of his 1972 Chevy Nova that drove by my apartment before heading on to his.

But then I knew I liked him "for reals" when I went on a date with a boy and made sure I was home by 11:30 p.m. so I would get to see Jeff when he got off work. We held hands during the movie "School of Rock" for the first time. I was so excited and felt butterflies galore! Then we kissed after watching "Pirates of the Carribean" on my laptop one night. The kiss kind of killed things though...We both talked about it later and were like, "Hmmmmm...that wasn't really that good." Which is why I broke up with him the next day. By that time his roommates hated me. They thought I was stuck up and mean. But then we got back together again on conditions that we wouldn't kiss and get serious and then I broke up with him again and then we got back together again and stayed together...until I broke up with him again a couple months later!

Then Jeff decided to go home for the summer and me too. He lives in Portland and I have family there who I nannied for, so I decided to go with him, as well as one of my girlfriends. It was on the way out there that I decided to break up with Jeff again and for good. Joseph was coming home and I didn't want to lead him on and my feelings were so jumbled up and confused. I even told my girlfriend about this while Jeff slept in the back seat. Then I met his family and we spent time together and had so much fun and then I realized that I was actually starting to really like him...

I went home to MT and he stayed in Portland to work. Joseph came home and called me. Oftentimes I would be on the phone with Joseph and Jeff would beep in and when Jeff beeped in I found myself annoyed with Joseph for wanting to keep talking. I would find excuses so I could get off the phone with Joseph. I eventually told Joseph about Jeff and Jeff already knew about Joseph. I continued to talk on the phone with both of them. Joseph sent me flowers and bought a plane ticket to come out to visit me in MT. I was excited but nervous as I realized that I liked both of them and didn't want to hurt either.

Joseph and I drove back to Utah together for school the beginning of August. He said I love you and held my hand and even kissed me and it felt nice but I was so confused. Joseph was there with me but Jeff was in Portland. I decided about the middle of August that I had to make a decision. I was feeling tremendous guilt over the whole situation and got absolutely NO ANSWER when I prayed, so I chose Joseph because he was familiar and there at the time. I called Jeff and told him and he was very supportive and didn't say much on the phone. I felt nothing at all when I got off the phone with him and nothing with Joseph. This part makes me sick to my stomach whenever I think about it.

I continued to break up with Joseph and get back together with him like I did Jeff for two weeks. Then Jeff came back to Utah and I saw him. I called him to see if he would like to go shopping with me. He said okay. We went and had an alright time. I could tell he was very distant. Then we went back to my apartment and watched a movie. We held hands. I broke up with Joseph that night. Joseph was mad, and I felt bad, but I just needed some time to think.

A couple nights later, I called Jeff and asked if I could talk to him for a minute. It was late and right after a football game. He said sure and came over to talk. We went for a drive and I told him then that I loved him. I spent my time at the football game with Joseph and Josh together (wierd, huh?) and realized then that I loved him. Jeff told me he needed time and that I should date other people. If I was still around when he was ready to date, then maybe it would work out then, but he didn't know if he still liked me anymore. I was devastated.

This went on for two months, him avoiding me and me crying. I was so confused! I knew that I didn't love or like Joseph, although he was still coming around. Then one night I lost it and told Joseph that I didn't love him, that I loved Jeff but I couldn't have him and I was sorry, but he (Joseph) needed to move on. I really hurt him that night, but he said something to me that really made me respect him even after all I had put him through. He said that if Jeff doesn't come around then it is his loss and he doesn't know what he is losing. Joseph never spoke with me again after that but he did get married to a girl in March who he met in November.

I turned my attention to Jeff then. We studied in the same place and I knew he still had to like me at least a little because he would have left that study area in the library if he didn't want to see me. Whenever we would see each other, Jeff would always ask me if I still felt the same way. I would always say yes. He would then ask me if I was dating anyone. I would say no. This went on for a couple months. Sometimes Jeff would let me in a bit, only to put up a wall again. All in all, if it wasn't for Jeff's roommate, Viddy, Jeff and I may not have gotten back together. He would always tell Jeff when he saw me on campus, that I still liked him, that I was a good girl and why doesn't he take me on a date? One day Jeff got so fed up with it that he told Viddy to date me himself!

Eventually, by some miracle, Jeff did come around and slowly but surely we ended up at the same parties and ended up sitting next to each other or talking together the whole time. By Halloween of that year, we had once again kissed. He told me that part of the reason he was so hesitant to date me again was because he knew it wouldn't just be for fun. We had already done that. When we kissed I was in heaven and it was definitely a 180 from our other first kiss. Fireworks must have gone off! We were married six months later and have been happy ever since!

Telling this story has been really nice. It makes me love him all the more!